I have as little hope about this year as the next guy, and the world is still falling apart and filled with monsters whose actions make me weep daily.
But, I am secretly trying to become an optimist in 2024. A person who doesn’t only think about the worst, saddest, most catastrophic things. Positivity doesn’t come naturally to me. I’m more of an Eeyore, mixed with a touch of Squidward, or the old guy from Up.
I’ve been reading books about happiness, and doing all kinds of things that are supposed to promote a more positive outlook. I exercise a lot these days, and I try to sleep more. I’m visualizing a happier, more successful future version of myself (just look at her, she’s written a book, and her hair is so lustrous).
I’m attempting to stop before I catastrophize, and ask myself deceptively simple questions like “what if things went well?” or “what if it turned out great?” These questions stump me, truly.
When it comes to parenting, my imagination has been captured by the question “why not yes?” The linked article explains it succinctly, but I first encountered the idea in a podcast episode, in which they discussed it in even more detail. The premise is pretty simple. Before jumping to say no, as you might normally be inclined to do, ask yourself … why not yes?
If your kid asks you to do a puzzle with them while you’re making dinner, instead of saying “no, I can’t, I’m cooking right now and we’re going to eat in ten minutes,” ask yourself if that’s truly the only option.
Could you say “we can have dinner half an hour later than usual without disrupting anyone’s schedule in a major way, so let’s see if we can finish the puzzle in 30 minutes. It might be fun to do it fast!”
Or, could you say “I can’t join you right now, but please set up your puzzle at the kitchen table so that I can watch and cheer you on while I’m cooking. When you’re done, we’ll clean up and eat.”
Or, could you say “let’s set it up on the coffee table so that we don’t have to clean it up for dinnertime. I’ll help you get started, and then I’ll have to go back to cooking.”
The kneejerk-no-impulse is strong in me, but I’m trying to do it a lot less. “Why not yes” is a concept that applies outside the realm of parenting, too. Earlier this week someone invited me out for coffee, and my impulse was to say no. I’m busy, overwhelmed, and somewhere deep down I was beset by worries that this wasn’t just a fun hangout, but an opportunity for them to tell me some sort of bad news in person. But, I asked myself … what if it’s just fun? And why not yes? The coffee date was fun and there was no bad news, and I definitely wasn’t too busy to spend an hour with someone I really like.
This week I’ve been elbow-deep in an annual planning process, trying to set out a business plan for 2024 and map out specifically how I’ll achieve each goal. What if I have a really successful year? Why not yes?
Since I’m trying to be less of an Eeyore, here is a random assortment of minor-key amusements, and wee joys from the first week or so of 2024.
My kid’s obsession with SCPs. The SCP foundation is a fictional secret organization that captures and contains various mysterious beings, known as “anomalies” or “SCPs,” while keeping their existence a secret from the rest of us, of course. I have yet to find out what SCP stands for. Perhaps I’ll let it remain a sweet mystery forever. Intrigued? Start by listening to the catchy tune SCP-173.
Simon Haisell’s year-long slow-read of Tolstoy’s War and Peace. More on this in a post later this month.
The woman who went viral for being furious about the fact that Quality Street changed their wrappers. (She probably wasn’t thinking about the eco-friendly, fewer-microplastics angle.) You might remember that my own discovery of this change led me down a deep rabbit hole of chocolate history, but it didn’t sour me on Quality Street. I bought and enjoyed a tin over Christmas and I didn’t mind the new wrappers one bit. But I do love this woman’s ire. It’s a travesty!
This t-shirt for the under-seen Canadian cult film Siege. My ex-boss (of the past decade) is on that shirt!
This fascinating article about how different we are from all the other humans who have ever come before us.
I'm also on the year-long read of War and Peace. Just 351 more chapters to go!
I love this. Why not yes!!!